CONFLICT RESOLUTION
Conflict resolution is a subject that not a lot of people like to talk about. It is sensitive, can be sensitive, and makes people uncomfortable. It does not have to be any of those things. Not when it can be broken down into several simple steps taken from the perspective of meeting with who you are having a conflict with.
- Like many other things, the first step is making sure that you have the right point of view. It is not a competition. Remember that conflict resolution is about compromise, not coming out ahead. With compromise you need to be prepared to give a little to achieve your goals. Without compromise, you will need to learn to live with the conflict that you are having. And that can be easier said than done. The idea is to aim for the most positive outcome and know ahead of time what you are willing to concede to make that happen.
- Do not be afraid to have a manager, therapist, or someone from HR sit in at your meeting as an impartial third party. You and the other party can get all your conflicts out in the open and relieve yourselves of the tension they have been creating without fear of creating more tension. After that, it should be a matter of finding common ground to resolve the conflict.
- Remember that “common ground” does not necessarily mean that you give up something that means the world to you but rather that you give the other person something of value to them. For example, if they would like you to stop doing something, if it is in your power to do so and it does not harm you, you might consider giving them their wish in exchange for something that you wish would happen. Of course, all this needs to be reasonable.
- Unilateral demands, unprofessional demands, and things of the like have no place in conflict resolution. Not from you and not from them. It is best to keep that in mind when planning how best to resolve your conflicts. The idea is to make life better for both people, not make one life worse.
- As always, put your best foot forward and look for the positives.